Society for years has been critical in how relationships with people with disabilities should be handled. Some say those with disabilities shouldn’t pursue relationships, just live their lives alone and be done with it. They won’t know the difference.
I have come to learn over the last decade that such mindset isn’t true. In my friendship and courtship with Billy, I learned that love has no limits. Love has no boundaries, given such person can have the ability to make their own decisions on how to live their life and what they want out of it. Like any other person would.
My visit last week rekindled a relationship years in the making that died due to pressure from society as well as pressure from outsiders looking in. People look down at him, just a simple person with many limitations. When in reality he has the same wants and needs as anyone else. Companionship, a sense of belonging that comes from any relationship. Isn’t that what everyone in this life deserves?
What surprised me about how things have changed in the last decade of me knowing him, one such thing is the mindset of my friends and his staff and their understanding of this random situation that is my relationship with him.
They are all for it. Because it brings me, and him, great happiness. People don’t see him as “a child” or me as “evil.” They see us as regular people in love.
I know my time with him is shorter given the age difference and his needs, and I know marriage might never play out the way it does in the real world. I may be higher functioning, and his needs are more than I can handle sometimes, but the fact remains the same.
Everyone on this earth deserves to be happy and find their soulnate, and it just so happened that the universe chose this for us. As to why, who knows? The universe works in mysterious ways.
But I know for a fact that the last decade has taught me to see love from a different point of view. It may not be the relationship that everyone wants for me, but however this plays out, I know for a fact that I made an impact on him and others who have stuck through our struggles with us.
Billy has taught me how to love, how to be patient, how to look at things from a different angle, how to see the world as a beautiful place despite it’s rather dark exterior.
I don’t pursue this to make me out to be some inspiration, nor do I do this because of some sickness like many people in the past made me out to be. It’s fate that made us click. It’s strength that has held us together in my journey to find myself. It’s the power that brings you up when your spirits are low.
I may not have the normal path set forth by society in front of me, but I am adventurous, spontaneous, and not afraid to see where this road takes me.
Love is without limits. As it should be. And how it will be.