Posted in Overcoming Adversity, Pondering about PTSD

Karma

A friend of mine posted about flashbacks she has had in regards to bullying as a kid.I have been down that road one too many times before. Bullying is sadly a part of a disabled person’s life, no matter how inclusive and accessible a school or job setting is. As a matter of fact, one of the reasons my chapter as a Vacation Planner came to an end was a result of bullying and isolation. And I have no shame in admitting it. And just like childhood, there was very little that could be done by my higher ups to stop it. Guess us adults need to buck up and handle things on our own.

One thing I do believe in is karma, that little nag of energy that can make you or break you, that aura that comes from reactions and behaviors we do everyday, the power that helps shape our destiny as a result of what we give and take from this world.

Right now for me, karma isn’t 100% on my side. Good karma is running a tad low. In a way, it’s a sign that I need to slow the hell down and take a better approach to healing my emotional scars so I can one day be back up where I want to be. It’s as if karma is that little tattletale kid who is the hall monitor, slowing you down and making you late to class, resulting in a lunch detention before your life goes back to normal and you can try again tomorrow. My potential new work assignment just so happens to be my lunch detention. 

But karma on those who do nothing with their lives but make others miserable relfects the same energy they send out to others right back to them. To me, that’s the best kind of karma. What goes around comes around.

For instance, from the time I started college up until now, my father who is a correctional officer at the county prison back home always gave me updates on people who connect two and two together upon seeing the same last name printed on his badge. My dad will go brag about all my accomplishments in detail as the look on their face turns into shock. Believe it or not, the blind girl you tortured as a kid can do some pretty cool things. 

Now I know karma doesn’t always play that way, as in the case of my latest work drama where one particular person is getting promoted, but at this point I could really care less what becomes of them, for if I do, it would hinder my own growth as a person trying to crawl out of the ashes and make something of my life despite my new placement. 

Thinking about the past, as in the case of my friend who brought this up, will only destroy me, you, or anyone in general. Could there be ways we could of handled life better, of course. But until someone invents time travel, we just got to roll with the punches and let karma and good faith take it’s course. Even if it means entering the scary unknown and moving forward. For moving on makes us stronger than any bully or bad guy in the world. 

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